Josh and Korey

My boy had his shots on Tuesday and is STILL not feeling well. It’s horrible for me to watch and listen to him in pain and be able to do nothing. My poor baby.

He rolled over today! For the first time. He rolled to the left and later to the right. What a little smartie. 😉

I’m feeling a little blue tonight, holding my miserable baby and thinking about all of my troubles. They are few and I am blessed(!) but they are troubling. I have been trying to hold myself together and be a strong and calming force for my family through my brother’s problems, but a familiar feeling has been nagging at me. Why do I have to do all this work? When is it my turn? I’m not certain how it’s fair that I deal with our family and try to help and be supportive and forgive him; all of this is work for me. I’m not feeling as though it’s being reciprocated. I can’t even get him to call me. At the same time, I have a husband to answer to and explain why my time is getting sucked into this black hole. I have my own family now, and perhaps it’s my fault for continually trying. I’ve threatened this before, but I’d like to mean it this time: I’m done. I’m tired, hurt and feeling like the sister of the prodigal son, constantly feeling slighted and under-appreciated. So please help me do this!

Tomorrow is another beautiful day, and I want to enjoy it.

My little love is four months old!

He is such a happy baby. He smiles all day, and his smiles are addicting. They make me want to move heaven and earth to make him smile again. He is a drool machine! He has discovered the joy of putting things in his mouth, and chews on his hands non-stop. If anything else is near, his eyes light up, his hands reach out for it, and shove it in his mouth. This includes toys, my sleeves, my hair, stuffed animals, blankets, and even once my elbow. His hand-eye coordination is getting really great. He can swat at and grab dangling, moving toys. He follows them with his eyes and reaches out for them expertly. He holds his head up so well, and during tummy time he gets his whole upper body off of the ground. You’ll see that below…

He is “talking” a lot. He sings, grunts, squeals, and squeaks with joy all day. He sings himself to sleep sometimes with load noises. His newest noise is the raspberry and he’s been “raspberrying” all day long! I will post a couple of videos; it’s adorable.

He watches me and loves the sound of my singing voice (aww, thanks Jacob!). He stares at Josh and lights up when Josh speaks to him. The latest and cutest development is the giggle laugh. He’s been laughing for some time — short fits of squealing laughter — but now he’s developed the cutest giggle and it is one of those sounds you’d do anything to hear. And we do. We will do ridiculous things to try and get him to laugh. You never know what will work. The other day it was me pretending to chomp away at his leg. He would throw his head back and giggle, like the first picture in this post.

He sits in his Bumbo chair often. He loves to be in there while I’m getting ready in the morning or cooking dinner. I pile some toys on the tray and he grabs each one and shoves it in his mouth in turn. His current favorites are Sophie the giraffe, some plastic keys from my mom, and this cute cute stuffed dragon from my cousin Charlotte (pictures to follow!). He has a rattling worm I keep in his car seat that he likes, and still enjoys the Sleep Sheep and his white noise machine. They are like magic for him.

He is a curious boy. He likes to see what is causing any noise he hears. He loves to look around and view the world, and gets bored easily if I only allow him one view. He’s still fighting his naps during the day, and I have to trick him to allow those eyes to close so he can sleep. He’s still not wanting to stop experiencing the world around him.

His soft little hands are constantly touching and grabbing. He likes to fall asleep with his hands clutched together, which is the sweetest thing. He runs his hands over my arm, my face, my chest, and then grabs my necklace or my hair. He loves to stand up. In fact, he doesn’t like to be held “like a baby” at all. He prefers to stand on your lap or sit upright. When I carry him around the house I hold him on my shoulder (like I was going to burp him) and he looks sideways at the world over my shoulder.

He has deliciously chunky legs and I love to squish them. He’s very squishy and snuggly during the day lately. he wants to be held and loved and hates to be put down. This is not very convenient for me, but we do the best we can. I’m still wearing him often around the house and out on errands. He loves the Moby wrap and falls asleep easily in it. I am trying to get him used to some independent alone time by putting him down in different places all over the house with toys to occupy himself.

Despite the fact that his feet do not touch the ground, he’s been loving his jumper (thanks, Lisa!) and can spin the little rattles on it with his hands. He bounces around in there probably once a day. He also likes toys hanging above him that he can grab.

He lifts his upper body up so well and squirms and actually moves himself quite a bit in this position. I think he will be off to crawling long before I want him to! Hiss sort-of army crawl allows him to move around in a circle and scoot closer to me when we’re reading on my bed. He’s getting really big! He still fits in most of his 3 month clothes, but some have become too short for him. He’s moving into the 6 month clothes now, which is always fun for me! Today is his 4-month appointment (and shots, unfortunately), and I will have to update you all tomorrow on his “specs.”