So I have reached 24 weeks. (Tomorrow it’ll be 25!) Technically speaking, it’s been 6 months, but as I have 3.5 to go, I wonder how confusing that is for others, and try not to say 6 months. I can’t believe it’s been half of a year!!!!!!

Preparedness. Well we have sort of put this on hold with the baby’s room full of boxes of kitchen stuff, and the kitchen gone, but we’ll be back to it before you know it. I have artwork to frame and Josh has shelves to hang, and then we have some important decisions to make. We still need to visit the mecca of baby stores, and my personal nightmare, Babies ‘R Us, and make a lot of decisions. I’m personally not very happy with one facet of this whole process, and it’s the “stuff” part. The crap* factor. I don’t feel like it makes sense to have so much STUFF for such a little person and it pains me to read about all of the “must-haves.” I KNOW they make life easier, so don’t tell me I’m just being naive, and yes, I’ll register for them, but it is overwhelming how much stuff you have and for how little time you use it!

Physical Concerns. Physically, I think I’m feeling fine, all things considered. I mean, if I looked this this for any other reason, obviously I’d be concerned and aggrieved, but  as this is for a good purpose, and what is happening is so miraculous, I can’t really complain. I guess I feel like I’m feeling really great for a person who grows larger by the day and is creating another human. Rockin! That said, I do have some strange and not-so-strange issues. My back and hips hurt, (not so strange) and my feet hurt (also not strange). I am tired all the time, and I mean exhausted, can’t move tired. I guess that makes sense…but it’s still kind of overwhelming.  The most frustrating new symptom is that I can’t breathe. I can’t get a deep breath and I feel like I am hyperventilating. I breathe really loudly in an effort to breathe as much air as I can (which is probably extremely annoying). I also yawn a lot, to try to get oxygen. I guess I’m feeling my lungs getting crowded? Anyone? Also, I look like Buddha and I forget how wide I am and that I can’t squeeze places that I used to. That sounds funnier than it is, trust me. It’s not in any way comfortable to sit in a desk chair at work, and I feel far from the computer. I get random days where I’m so thirsty I can’t stop drinking water, and then I’ll feel normal again. I’m sure all of this has a purpose. I feel like I overheat really easily and I’m out of breath easily (not a surprise anymore) but I’m sure that’s all related to the additional mass. 🙂

Mental concerns. Pretty good here, taking work concerns out of the equation (I’m sure NO ONE wants to hear about them anymore). There are a lot of changes happening, and that’s never been easy for me. In the last few weeks we’ve: destroyed the kitchen, Josh got a new truck, and sold the Harley. Those are three big things! It’s weird to think that 2/3 of our vehicles changed. Well now we only have two… so yeah, big changes. I don’t feel very patient right now, which I think is due to the overheating, can’t breathe, back and feet hurting stuff. Also, I feel this need to place myself inside a bubble of peace, and I don’t really want to hear horrible and depressing things. I think this is a very important psychological process, and it interests me. It’s like my brain is forcing myself to create a calm environment and take care of my mental health. Aren’t humans amazing!? I’m still trying to reconcile the fact that the baby is a person, and this person is going to one day be living in my house and asking me questions…that is what makes it hard to do things like choose a name for him (which, by the way, we’ve done!) and think about him as this individual with a personality. I always thought I’d be so anxious to know what he looks like and who he is, but right now, he’s this rather amorphous blob to me; like something that is going to happen one day, but doesn’t exist yet, when in fact he does exist. Maybe I think the kicking is just another weird and uncomfortable physical side-effect still?

Time concerns. Well with 3.5 months to go, I’m feeling like this is going to be the fun part! I have a wedding to go to in Colorado, my baby shower, final preparations on the room, and a new kitchen to unpack and move into! YAY! Somehow, because this whole process takes so long, I guess, it feels like they actual day when we take a baby home, is still infinitely far away. I know it’s not anymore, but it still feels anything but near. I’m still feeling like December is a long time away. Perhaps when the weather “changes” it will sink in a little. I also can’t believe how fast time seems to be moving now. I think the first trimester was just really long for me…

*If you know Josh, you know that he calls everything “crap” and it makes me mad. To me, “crap” is just that: crap. Not useful things that I use, need, or care about. So when he asks me when I’m going to put away the “crap” in the kitchen, and he means plates, pots, and utensils, I always bristle a little. 🙂