30 years ago today my brother was born. 

I should be celebrating with you today, Riley. You didn’t live long enough to turn 30. I know that birthdays are irrelevant to you now, but I hope you know how we have made space for your memory and legacy in our lives, as we always will. 

You should be here. I wouldn’t take you away from the place you are now, but I wish I had more time on this earth with you, because I miss you now. It’s so weird to commemorate a birthday that you aren’t here for. I am heartbroken when I allow myself to think about how I would have imagined we would spend this day. 

I heard this song recently and connected with the lyrics:

Broken by Lifehouse on YouTube
Happy birthday, Riley.